Sex on a first date a Yay or Nay?

Hi guys, 

Today on Ask Deina, a loyal follower has discreetly sent in this question :

"Dear EasyLivingDose,  I met this guy a few months ago and we've become fast friends.  We are going on our first proper date this weekend.  Is it okay for me to have sex with him on our date night as we've planned something super romantic. I am a virgin and he's sweet,  gentle and kind and being a modern woman I feel it is time to give it up based on what I've read and seen around me? He seems to be the one. Pls help. Desperate virgin."

Image Source: Salon 

This is Our Reply:

Dear Desperate Virgin, 

Whether you were raised in a Christian,  Muslim,  liberal or any other religious home, a woman's virginity is a thing of celebration.  In some cultures,  the loss of one's purity is considered a rite of passage. This begs the question. Celebration by whom? The society,  religions, the woman's husband / partner or herself?  Personally,  and as a woman who's under the tutelage of feminism and who's still learning to become the truest version of myself, I would rather a woman's purity is celebrated by the woman and not based on what society deems appropriate or inappropriate.

Image Source: Nyfamilylife 

Therefore, it is within your power to decide to keep yourself holy and pure before marriage or otherwise without judgements from outsiders. In the end it is infact your body,  to do with whatever you will. That said,  at EasyLivingDose,  we encourage women to find their inner selves and rise above their sexuality.  Only then can you have full control of your body soul and spirit. 

Now is it okay for you to have sexual relations on a first date or give up your innocence for what may not be? We think not. He may seem like the one for you at the moment but a feeling alone doesn't equate accuracy.  When it comes to matters of the heart feelings are things that should be carefully controlled.  

From your question, we see a misconception that is often passed down from one generations of young girls to others. Romantic dinner doesn't or shouldn't equal sexual relations.   He is super sweet and kind doesn't necessarily make him the one. Heck! there are sweet souls everywhere.  The motive behind that sweet, patient and gentle nature might be based on a carefully calculated, selfish wants and desires unbeknownst to your innocent self.

Although we can't tell how old you are from your question, our best advice to you is to keep on wearing those purity rings and keep those legs closed until you are certain. Until "he seems like" becomes "surely" and "surely only happens on the eve of your wedding day." Call us old-fashioned but you can never go wrong with maintaining your purity for your sake and giving it up for the fulfilment of your purpose as a woman. 

We hope you find your happiness sooner. 

Catch up soon,

Xoxo 

T.D.A